Secret Tips To Be Happy Parents

What a joy to be a parent! I am sure nobody would disagree with this. In fact most of us, spend most of our life's energy and resources for our children.

But life is not always rosy, isn't it? There are times, when you feel very frustrated. Piles of laundry, super messy house, noisy kids, rebellious teens, I am sure some of you, if not many, would understand the challenges.

How do we survive this frustration?

Sometimes, what we need just a different perspective. A different paradigm, is all we need.

1. Learn to see the life, in "what if"

One stressed woman was seeing a psychiatrist. She was even contemplating suicide. Life is unbearable, she complaint. The chores never ended. The house was always in the mess, no matter how hard she tried to put it in order. The kids were out of control, they created all the mess in the home. She was tired and had it enough.

The psychiatrist kept listening, then he told her, she could have the perfect life she wanted. Clean house, no more chores, no more noise, everything in order. All those, she could have, if she did not have the kids. What if, she had all that tranquility and lived a different life of a childless woman, he asked.

She was stunned. From that moment, she never saw that frustration again. She knew she would have rather chosen to have the kids, with all the headache that came along with it

2. Second chance in life

Victor Frankl was a famous psychiatrist, who survived the Nazi camp, and the author of "In Search of Meaning". One of his beautiful quote is "Live as if you were living already for the second time and as if you had acted the first time as wrongly as you are about to act now!"

There was a movie a few years ago named About Time. In that story, the man could travel back in time. Wow, isn't that wonderful? For all the mistakes you made in the past, you can always rectify it by going back to the past in time! 

But, even in that story, he learned a lesson. Everyday, as he lived, he imagined what he would do, if he could come back again from the future, to do what he need to do today. It's a different perspective. Without using his power, he has learned and decided, that everyday, he would live his life to make his everyday counted.

So imagine, you are just back from work and feel very stress. The children are noisy, nagging and screaming for your attention. You could choose to shut them off, scold them or ignore them.

Or you could imagine, that you are "the future" of yourself, who just came back from the future to fix "today". What would you do?

In future, would you miss the days you could have spent with your kids?

(C), August 2015

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